Session 6 – Power of Family of Origin

POWER OF FAMILY OF ORIGIN

Preparation

In preparation for this week’s D-Group:
Memorize and Meditate on
Deuteronomy 6:6-8

Read:

What is a family of origin?

Whether you realise it or not, the influence of our family goes on for a lifetime both for good and bad. Most of our learning experiences, especially when it comes to social behaviour, are learned through our family of origin.

We may not fully realise the extent of the influence of our family upon us and often time we may even deny it. Perhaps because we do not want to accept that none of our family is perfect. For others, there is this sense of betrayal when we must admit that our parents are not perfect in showing us all the examples we want to learn in life.

However, accepting the defect of our family of origin may be the gate of redemption for us to grow as a disciple of Jesus. Today, we will explore this important lesson of the family of origin and learn how to grow better without jeopardizing our own spirituality.

Accountability (10 Minutes)

Share with your group members how you dealt with anger after having discussed it in the previous lesson.
 
 

Bible Discussion (20 Minutes)

1. Read Genesis 12:10-13, Genesis 20:1-2 and compare it with Genesis 26: 6-9. What pattern do you see in these three passages? Where do you think Isaac got the idea to do what he did in the story?

2. Read Genesis 27: 33-37 and compare it with Genesis 37: 31-33. What pattern do you notice between Jacob and his children? What important lesson can you learn about family influences on us?

3. Read Luke 2:52. What examples from Jesus can we learn on how we to develop our character despite the brokenness around us?

 

Life Transformation (20 Minutes)

1. Despite being a Christian, we are not spared from past broken relationships with people including our own family members. Share with your group members what are some of the brokenness that you noticed that you carry over from your family of origin. E.g. Unhealthy pattern of dealing with conflict, overprotective behaviour, lack of certain loving behaviour, increased anxiety, etc.

2. Sometimes our family/trusted friends/people had done certain things that hurt us, and we still carry on with the pain and anger in us. Discuss with your group members what are some steps we should take as a Christian and disciples of Jesus to confront these pain and hurts, and to make some form of closure with these people who had hurt us?

3. Despite our imperfections, what kind of work with God do we need to do in order for us to ensure we can end the cycle of defective family pattern in us, to ensure our future generation do not repeat the same brokenness we have been through?

4. Share with your group, some of the good examples that you have learned from your family of origin that you think had helped you to be a better disciple of Jesus.

 

Intercessory Prayer (10 Minutes)

1. Pray for your family. Each one of us may have different experiences and memories of our family of origin. For the things that had become a blessing to you, thank God for all those blessings. But for things that may have hurt you and left emotional scars, pray that God will help you find healing in Him.
 
2. Ask the Lord to show you if there are things from your family of origin that you need to change for you to be a better disciple of Jesus.
 
3. Pray that your Church can be the “second family” for all who will join especially for those who had been through difficult times in their experience with their family of origin.

 

LEADER’S TIP

1. Sharing about our family can be difficult for many. There is a saying “don’t wash your dirty linen in public” and this statement often relates to embarrassing family matters. Maintain a good sense of confidentiality among all the group members while at the same time allow them to conclude that such sharing is important for spiritual growth.

2. Nobody will have identical family experience with someone else. Each family dynamic is unique with some general principles that are applicable to most. Make your best attempt to not dwell on too many impractical details that may distract the whole session to trying to find the “best” family examples to be followed by all.

3. At the end of the session, emphasize the fact that in the original plan of God, the family was meant to be the “little heaven on earth”. However, because of sin, all families will go through some brokenness in one way or the other. It is in God’s divine wisdom that He wants to restore this family into what He had planned at the beginning of the Creation.

**Additional Resources
Lessons from the Longest Study on Human Development
What Makes a Good Life?